The problem with “I have a boyfriend”

Of Means and Ends

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Many of us have probably met a woman who wears a fake engagement or wedding ring to avoid advances by men. Often times women will offer up “I have a boyfriend” as a magical phrase to get men to leave them alone and stop hitting on them. It’s understandable that women want to avoid a conflict, especially when men often won’t take “no thank you” for an answer.

But there are disturbing undercurrents to this practice. Women are conditioned to be “nice” and not cause problems. While of course we should all employ basic human decency and politeness, when that doesn’t work it’s often hard for women to be firm and unequivocal when they want to be left alone. There’s an assumptive attitude that some of these men have in assuming that a stranger they just decided to talk to owes them some kind of explanation for not being interested…

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5 Reasons You Should Never Settle

JamesMSama.com

As I sit here to write this article, I’m in our hotel room overlooking the beach. The waves sound so close you feel like you can put your hand out the window and touch them. My girlfriend is making coffee. Her tanned skin is accentuated even further by the stark white walls. The rays of sun are coming through the blinds signaling a new day has begun. Michael Bublé is permeating the room from my laptop speakers.

Next to me on the table is this month’s copy of Esquire, the cover of which is beckoning us with “84 Things A Man Should Do Before He Dies.” And I sit here thinking to myself – no matter how many failures I face or how hard life becomes, I refuse to settle.

You can settle for less than you deserve in many areas of life. A job you can’t stand going to…

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8 Things Guys Secretly Love

JamesMSama.com

Whether a guy is just starting to date a woman or is in a committed relationship with her, there are small things that she may do without thinking twice that guys secretly love.

While there are many, here are eight to start.

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Laying your head on his chest.

When laying on the couch watching TV or laying in bed after a long day, it’s one of the best feelings when a woman lays her head down on your chest and puts her arm over you.

As men, we enjoy feeling as though we are being protective, and this signifies that she feels safe in our arms.

When you text him first.

There is a lot of pressure on guys to always initiate conversation. Sometimes he may not know if he’s being too pushy or texting too much – he might overthink it and not text you at all, which could…

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8 Things She Secretly Loves

JamesMSama.com

Now that we’ve discussed 8 Things Guys Secretly Love, we can’t forget the general theme of this blog – being chivalrous and romantic towards women. Striving to be better. Building healthier relationships.

That being said, what are some things that you may not realize make as big of an impact as they do?

Here are eight things that she secretly loves.

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Good morning texts.

A good morning text first thing doesn’t just say “good morning” – it says “you’re the first person I thought of when I woke up today.”

For over a year I have sent one of these to my girlfriend literally every single day without missing one. Small romantic acts aren’t just for the “honeymoon phase” of your relationship. Consistency is key.

Hint: This includes goodnight texts, too.

Play with her hair if you’re laying together on the couch or in bed.

Just do it. Trust…

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To the girls who travel: Don’t date a guy who doesn’t travel

The Gypsea Chronicles

Yes, you are the girl with the unkempt room and poor time management. You have many things in your head, most of which are notes-to-self on what your future self should do or go to. You are a dreamer, and that means that if the guy you date isn’t like you, it’s unlikely to work out.

Don’t date a guy who doesn’t travel. He is the guy with the medicine cabinet filled with shaving cream, hair gel and toothbrushes he doesn’t use anymore. His skin is fair and soft like a baby’s, which means he doesn’t go out much or at all. He is intolerant to the sun, when in fact you love every minute you are under it, soaking each ray of sunshine into your now bronze skin. He combs and styles his hair in memorized strokes every morning (as he has been doing this for months, maybe years…

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